The following is a compilation of excerpts from internal Family publications for members age 14-years and up. Specifically, it is taken from FSMs 289, 290 and 293, DO, published March - May 1996.
Excerpts from FSM 289, March 1996
[From Apollos, the Family's "theologian."] I just yielded to Him the way I know a man wants his wife or lover to yield to him. I surrendered to Jesus, relaxing and resting, calling on Him and asking Him to please take me as I was, to forgive me for my former skepticism, and to love me up in the spirit....And strangely, this time with Him seemed to even be somewhat stimulating in a sexual way, as I somehow perceived or felt that He indeed was making love with me in Spirit....Boy, I never thought that saying yes to Jesus meant saying yes to Him fucking me....I leaned back against the headboard of my bed and closed my eyes and began praying and loving the Lord and telling Him that I wanted Him and needed Him and I wanted Him to fill me with his seeds, asking Him to fuck me and sock it to me, etc.
[From a male member] Mama, you have the Words of eternal life, where else would I go?!....I'm looking forward to trying it....to practice the role of being a female sex partner to Jesus....I'm willing to try....in faith and obedience to the Lord and you, my dear Mama and Peter....I think David in the Psalms was having a very intimate love relationship with the Lord in places where he makes such declarations as: "As the hart panteth after the water brooks, so panteth my soul after Thee, O God"(Psa.42:1)....Trying to masturbate while having love-up with Jesus I think is going to be the most difficult of the three aspects of the "Loving Jesus" revelation for me. Usually my masturbation fantasies are quite erotic, with gorgeous Family and other women and even goddesses at times, but in all cases women. Doing it to Jesus may be difficult at first to attain an orgasm, but I'll give it a try. Even if I don't have an orgasm at first, I think I could still masturbate while loving Jesus as best I can....Saying words of love to Jesus during lovemaking from the standpoint of being a female in the spirit will be an entirely new dimension for me and may not be so easy at first, but I do intend to also give this a good try.
[From a female member] In Part 4, the Lord is speaking in prophecy about how we can show Him our love when we masturbate, if we wish to.(See ML #3030:29.) Before I read this series of GNs when I would masturbate, I would envision one of the Lord's angels making love to me....When I was reading the GN about masturbation and loving Jesus, I was in my bedroom alone at the time. I got so turned on all of a sudden to try it. So I did! I did all the things you were saying to do, Mama, like telling Jesus I loved Him and desired Him. I read one of the prophecies again while I was goosing myself in the chair and it was so sexy. I visualized Jesus fucking me and it was terrific....I decided why not devote the evening to Jesus, like I do when I have my normal dates with my sharing partners. I got a glass of wine and put on some music [and] got in bed.... I just closed my eyes and began saying the love words to Jesus. Well, one thing led to another, and before I knew it, I had a terrific orgasm that left me thankful I had put the "Do not Disturb" sign on the door - ha!
Personally, I think it'll be a real time of decision for our young people, perhaps similar to how the FF revolution was for the first-generation adults....I think this may just do the same! It seems to me that with the Charter, quite a few of the teens and YAs are experimenting with freedoms which push them towards the "cool" or "worldly" side, and some are getting quite into it. Whereas the way the New Wine and the Lord are moving is totally in the opposite direction, getting less and less "cool" and "worldly" all the time, but more revolutionary, radical and totally nonconformed to the world. So this series may be a shock!
That night after I read Part 2 of the "Loving Jesus" series....I decided that I was going to try it, and as I masturbated, I fantasized with the Lord and I said the same things to the Lord that I would say when I fantasized about a woman I'm very much in love with - telling Him that I loved Him and wanted to be with Him and fuck Him and be fucked by Him....After I finished reading Part 4, I had another time of praise and a nice love-up with the Lord, making love with Him while I masturbated, and letting Him fuck me with His Love. It was very nice, thank the Lord!....You know, it's funny, but when Dad went to be with the Lord, one thing that I was a little worried about was that we would get more conservative sexually as a Family. The general trend in the Family regarding sexuality has been towards the conservative side for the past few years, I'd say, and I figured that with Dad gone it was just going to get "worse" - in other words, more conservative, which is what I considered "worse!" - Ha! I mean no disrespect in saying this, Mama, but I did imagine you to be quite conservative sexually as compared to Dad. Dad seemed to always be the one promoting sex or talking about sex, so I figured with him gone, no one would promote it or talk about it any more. So I must say it was quite a happy surprise to read in "Mama's Love Story" and in these "Loving Jesus" GNs that you're not that way at all! Instead of getting more conservative in this area, I would say we're getting more liberal.
Excerpts from FSM 290, March 1996
[Female member]Long live the queen and the king! Long live the "Loving Jesus" revelation! Long live the radical spirit of David!
I had a really wonderful experience Loving Jesus and I wanted to write you about it. I'm super exited!...It was nap time....I got out the GN again and found those parts and reread them quickly, so I would remember the suggested things you can say to the Lord. I started praying and telling the Lord the love words. To come out and say, "Come, fuck me, Jesus," was very difficult....I was part praying, part masturbating....It was so neat!...I thought...that I wouldn't even be able to go. But I did. It was thrilling!
I know what turns me on (as a man) for a woman to say to me while making love, and so in playing the role of a woman in the spirit, I could anticipate what the Lord would want to hear, and those words came easily....I'll catch myself thinking, "What are the academics going to think of this, or our friends, or our persecutors?" But that's obviously just looking to the thoughts and opinions of man, and if we're going to start resting our doctrines and beliefs on that, we'll immediately relinquish the truly special place and anointing that we have as His Endtime children that "follow the Lamb withersoever He goeth."
[Female member] The basic content of the "Loving Jesus" GNs wasn't a problem for me, as I saw that it was just expanding on what Dad has said before....The part about masturbating with Jesus didn't bother me, as I have done this in the past, but I always wondered what the Lord thought about it....So much talk about sex does tend to make me horny. Sometimes while reading this series I would stop and masturbate, thinking of Jesus, and it sure was a wonderful experience!
I think this is a wonderful series and will help keep us radical and separated from the world with our sexy doctrines! Praise the Lord!
[Female member] About having masturbation love-ups with Jesus....when I read the part that says, "If you want a special time with Me, and if you want to feel My loving, you can touch yourself and you can make yourself go, and it will be My loving you," I practically jumped up and down for joy, as I started having this experience quite some time ago.
It was very inspiring for me to see how the Lord is still in the business of keeping us separate from the system and the Church system. With all the new changes in the Family and us getting more tolerant of some things, I was kind of getting a little concerned that we would get too close to the world. But thank the Lord, you, Mama and Peter, are new bottles that keep us alive and separate from the world with the New Wine.
Excerpts from FSM 293, May 1996
Loving Jesus in this intimate and even sexual way is something that I thought of many times in the past, and even fantasized about. However, because of my conservative and churchy upbringing, I always thought that it couldn't possibly be the right thing to do, much less something that the Lord Himself could request!
[Female member] It wasn't such a shock to me about loving Jesus and saying sexy, loving words to Him while masturbating, as I'd already experienced this to an extend. I had fantasized about making love with Jesus. a few times....Oh, Mama, thank you for being faithful to go ahead and deliver the message from the Lord....It's not like I've got a total victory about this revelation. I mean, my very first reaction to this was raised eyebrows and wide eyes.
[Female senior teen] It is quite a heavy revelation, and I must admit that I got hit with some questions like, "Why does it have to be so sexual and graphic? Why does the Lord ask it of our men too?" But one thing that helped me was where Mama said, "If that's what the Lord asks of us, who are we to question?" It's really true! Who are we to try to figure out in our finite minds why the Lord wants it that way? It's quite exciting to see how a whole new generation is basically taking on their first radical new revelation from their new king and queen!
As far as the whole radical thing about us men making love with Jesus as women in the spirit, all I can say is, "Wow! I'm gonna hang on tight for this one and ride the wave as best I can!"....While we were reading this GN...at one point the Enemy was discouraging me about it. But then, just as clear as anything, the Lord gave me a verse that I have heard so much and is one of the foundations of our Christian life: "Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, with all thy soul and with all thy mind; this is the first and great commandment"(Mat.22:37,38). Wow, it took on a whole new meaning! How often have we read, sung, or shared that verse with others? And now the Lord is giving us the full deep meaning of it and showing us how we can apply it fully! - How wonderful!....Incorporating the spiritual aspect into physical sex is a little difficult for me at this point....I haven't yet become a woman in spirit and had Jesus make love to me....I guess the Lord just had to make it shocking, to shake us out of our ruts and make us wake up and tune in to what He was saying. One thing for sure - if Dad, Mama and Peter say it, then it's good enough for me. I'm just so thankful for this "Loving Jesus" Revolution.
[Female member] I put on the tape "When You Need Him Most," hugged a pillow and took the plunge in saying love words to Him.
The "Loving Jesus" series...is a milestone in the Family and I want to follow closely....I have no doubts whatsoever about the "Loving Jesus" revelation. I know it's the Lord and I'm very thankful for it.